Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Homework and other matters

Well, it has been a challenging couple of weeks, more than I thought it would be. I'm glad, to be honest. I like challenges! I rise to them much better than humdrum stuff. I think if I found seminary too easy, I wouldn't do as well. As it is, I'm striving, reaching, pushing myself (though not TOO hard) to learn more and do well. Even the minor failures (falling asleep during meditation, for instance) are things which I have managed to learn from. I am proud that I've managed to get all the paperwork done and together for the month. I only have a couple of more pieces to add to the pile, but the work has to wait for my Dean to get me some information.

Thinking back since the first day of classes, I think the most challenging thing for me was to do the guided meditation from our psyche book. I actually find that rather disturbing, because I've been doing meditation exercises for so long, over 20 years! To find myself falling asleep was embarassing, to say the least. I suspect that I was working myself rather hard, and my body just took what it needed whether I wanted to give it or not.

Next month, we move on to Buddhism and Native American religions. I feel ready to move on! I'm looking forward to it, but I'm forcing myself to wait until I mail off my homework package before I begin next month's work. Since I got everything completed a couple of days before it was due, I can take this time to relax and regroup, and prepare myself for October.

Speaking of October, I am going on a retreat! I'm very excited; we've scraped together a few dollars so that I can attend the UU Women's retreat in Maine. My pastor is going, and invited me to come along, and so I am going. Working only with women is a challenge for me. I never know how to act around other females. This will be an excellent bit of spiritual work for me, as well as a long weekend away from the house. I'll actually be gone over Halloween, which is a bit of a disappointment (I wanted to see the twins all dressed up), but I'll be back in time for their birthday party on the 1st (can you believe they'll be 4??).

In other news, one of the lists I'm on is slowly falling apart. The founder is leaving for reasons of his own, his partner left a little while ago, and several other people are jumping ship. I find I am disappointed in some of the people involved. It isn't that I'm upset they yelled or argued, or even that they had to take a hiatus - everyone does those things. But I guess I had seen the people involved as being in it "for the long haul" and to find out that the committment isn't there... it was a let-down. I'll be sticking with the group, for a while at least, to see where it goes. There's still a dedicated core of people, though of course when one strong leader leaves and a committee tries to take over, things *always* fall apart. I guess the question isn't whether it'll ever be the same (because it won't), but whether it will survive the changes and come out squalling and ready to face the world.

The search for the Neokoroi web design continues. I have a funny feeling I'm going to need to actually go and make it up from scratch, minus the template. I'm... so not good at that. LOL... I'm fine at HTML and CSS, but creating a template from scratch is a real stretch for me, and is going to take forever. I'm definitely no graphics artist. As a last resort, I bookmarked a few images from iStockPhoto, and I'll purchase a couple on my own dime and turn them into a header and background images. It's hard, though, trying to find something to please everyone. I'm glad that I'm getting the great feedback I am, though, because it's helping me figure out what will best suit the group as a whole. It's also REALLY nice to see everyone excited and talking again. :) I missed that! There's a lot of fun participation going on, and we've gotten entries for the website as well.

We'll weather the rough spots. Life is too good to waste in frustration right now. :)
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