Monday, November 1, 2010

Something you hate about yourself

This is a tough one for me. There are lots of things I hate about myself, and most of them are pretty petty, as such things go. I hate being overweight, I hate being addicted to food, I hate that I can't seem to follow through on choices in regards to exercise. I hate that being in peri-menopause has caused my face to break out and my emotions to swing like I was a teen-ager, but without the excuse of lack of maturity. Even more, I hate the return to sanity a few moments later, when I look at my actions and wonder what the heck was going on in my mind.

If I had to pare it down to just one thing, though, it would be that I hate my fears. I'm much better now than I used to be, but fear of the unknown seems to freeze me. I worry about what other people will think, or about how my actions will cause people to see me. I make up for those fears by being a loud extrovert, wearing odd clothing and being a loud advocate for the middle path of balance. I suspect a lot of people think I'm nutty... including me.
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